Bang by Barry Lyga

When Sebastian was four years old, he accidentally killed his infant sister with a gun. Ten years later, Sebastian is waiting for the right time to use a gun on himself. The voice in his head will tell him when.

Sebastian lives with his mother in the same house where the accident happened. She won't talk about his sister Lola and what happened that horrible day even though Sebastian needs her to. By trying to avoid it, neither can ever escape it for long. His dad left long ago.

Sebastian is the guy who shot his sister. Everyone knows it even if they don't talk about it anymore, so Sebastian is pleased when he meets Aneesa, a new girl in town. He is immediately taken with her face and how it is framed by the scarf wrapped around her head. Aneesa is different and doesn't know anything about Sebastian's past. They begin hanging out and quickly bond.

Aneesa suggests that she and Sebastian start an online video series of Sebastian making pizza (after impressing her with his cooking skills). They hope they will eventually be able to make money if the videos become popular enough. Is his friendship (and maybe more?) with Aneesa enough to stop the voice in his head?

The horrible death of his sister has eaten away at Sebastian, and it has come to define who he is. Heart wrenching but with hope - just what you expect from Barry Lyga.

For more info, check out the Indianapolis Public Library catalog and the author's site.